i answered my own question :-)
i had to download hibernate, then build it, then build a jar file (i know that class has to be in the jbpm stuff somewheres, but i couldnt find it)
also you need to add all the faces jar files under jbpm-starters-kit-3.0/jbpm/lib/jsf
and the jbpm-starters-kit-3.0/jbpm-server/lib/dom4j.jar
this should get you to be able to compile the jbpm-starters-kit-3.0/jbpm/src/java.webapp
if you want to start building things, I'd not start with the starterkit, use the normal jbpm project for that. This includes hibernate et al, so downloading and building dependend libraries is not needed then.
The starterkit is for a quick download and runnning the included process or deploying new processes using the default config and webapp.