This is what I have read and seen. Unfortunately there is no stead fast true rule for those settings. It is always a depends on many factors. I have never heard to set them to the same setting, but the more Connections you have created the more memory it takes up. Obviously constantly creating and removing these objects have an effect/affect in some way.
But the golden rule it to do profiling and load testing on it. There is one performance tuning technique where you tune the wait states. So getting connections from a Connection Pool is one of the places where there can be a wait state. Clients waiting for connections to return to the pool, or new connections to be made. So you need a profile tool to tell you based on load how many connections are being used, how many clients are waiting, and to adjust your settings accordingly and see how it affects your performance.
So what this means is that you have to test your own system and find the best numbers for your application. Now, there are some general guidlines for sizes of applications and databases, but those are just general, and I don't have those memorized.
if i find a good tool for that manner i'll post it here again.